This and That

A few days ago I had a complete electronics breakdown, DVD player and CD/Tape/Radio went capute, capoote? Kapoot? Kapute? Whatever. They broke. Well, I think the tape player still works, but who has tapes anymore? If you have tapes, you're a loser. That's right I said it. LOSER! Okay, to be honest, I did not have a complete breakdown of electronics, my TV and Laptop still work (Magnavox Colour TV-MS Word won’t let me spell colour with a “u” Interesting- and a Macintosh PowerBook Titanium G4, y'all! Yes, I was one of the first kids on the block to buy the PowerBook G4 when it was made out of Titanium. I'm a trendsetter, I am. What?) Actually, the CD/Tape/Radio gizmo stopped playing CDs a while ago, but I kept it so I could route the DVD player through it so I could watch DVDs in stereo. I tell ya, watching porn in stereo? Awesome. Really. Oh, and yes, my TV is not stereophonic. Don’t ask. It was a gift from dear old Mom and Dad. Well, at least they got me a colour TV; could have been worse, I suppose. So, my ability to watch porn in stereo is seriously compromised (I could watch it on VHS, but it takes too long to fast forward through the boring parts, i.e., the dialogue. And I wouldn’t get to see all the cool extras that come with every DVD! That would suck. Out takes and bloopers for Porn? Priceless. Now many of you just might be asking, “why, Michael, why don’t you just go out and buy a new DVD player? They’re cheap!” And I would respond, “why yes, concerned reader, DVD players are cheap, but you see, concerned reader, my DVD player currently has Billy’s Hollywood Screen Kiss held hostage." How is it being held hostage? The damn thing won’t open and give me my DVD back! Now, fortunately, this is a DVD I happen to own and, therefore, do not need t return by a certain time, but still, it is annoying. Long story ending, I need to take apart my DVD player and retrieve my movie before throwing it out the window in a stereotypical display of “gay rage.”

Oh, damn, it’s 9:00 am, I have to get to the gym. Back in a bit.

Okay, I’m back. Where was I? Oh, yes. DVD player not working and I need to buy a new one. At some point. Soon. You know, I could have just said my DVD player isn’t working and need to buy a new one, making this a much shorter post. Oh, well.

Aaaand….

I went out and bought Christopher Rice’s new book, Light Before Day. I might finish it today unless one of my many friends calls and wants to do something…Hello? Friends?........Fine, fuck off! I don’t need you! I’ve got my DVDs…oh, wait..um…I’ve got my books to keep me company. So, if I finish Rice’s book today, I’ll post what I think of it later. Sound good? Good. I’m happy. Are you happy?

Hope you are all having a good day.

-Michael

One more thing.
The other day, I was standing at the stoplight on corner 17th and Castro and this women walks by me and says to me, with some derision, “work out much?” And walks off. Now anyone that knows me, knows that, yes, I do work out. Normally this might be construed as a compliment, if it were not for the fact that, A.) She said it with derision. B.) She was, honest to god, HUGE! And not huge in the tall sense, I mean huge as in barely able to walk. I wasn’t sure why she felt compelled to say this to me. After all, I live in the Castro where being a gym rat is not uncommon. So, you know, WTF? As she was walking past me, I almost wanted to say to her, “eat much?” But I didn’t because I didn’t think that would be nice. Now I’m not a body fascist by any means. If someone doesn’t want to go to the gym, fine by me, I don’t care one way or the other. So, I was a little taken back by her comment.

You know, after re-reading this last paragraph, I do sound, maybe, a little bit of a body fascist.

Anyway, I just thought that was a strange thing to happen.